September 30, 2008

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The Canisters Were Filled With Drugs

I'm not entirely too sure but I think the canisters were filled with either helium or oxygen. Either way it doesn't matter because Pat is sitting over in that corner still sucking the tip of the valve. His lips started bleeding only five minutes into his high. I swear if there was some way to trip balls after eating dog shit he would be the guy to discover it. Last time I was in his room he spilled bong water all over my favorite sweatshirt. I had to throw it out because three months and forty washes later my landlord, Mrs. Jackson, thought I was dealing. Whatever. All I know is that if Pat keeps up this sort of lifestyle he will be doing coke off of urinals and running a meth lab out of his bedroom in less than a month.

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