April 29, 2010

Galactic Superheroes. With an E.

I spelled superheroes wrong in the label of the new issue of 50 to 1.

Bonus points to whoever finds it first!

Here is the new issue so fresh and so clean, clean. "Galactic Superheroes" will fill your boots with lightning. Read it and comment and then submit. Too many "ands."

Okay, so I have an idea for an actual post. If I don't forget it, I'll make it tomorrow. Right now, I have to work on Only Human.

Read my [bad] story about Futurama here.

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Currently listening to: Lil' Wayne
Song: Lollipop
Album: Tha Carter 3

April 28, 2010

Futurama

Futurama
(written for Titular but got rejected because it isn't very good haha)

While God continues to prove to me that he does not exist, you, in fact, frequently show me that happiness can exist without him. Every single time I look into your eye, I am reminded how to smile. After I fell into the cryogenics freezer one thousand years ago, everyone I knew and loved died long before I was thawed. Even my dog. It is soul crushing. But you, you show me that I still have a reason to exist years after I was intended to.

The flat, violet strands of hair cover your eye in a way that reminds me clouds over the moon at night. Back before there were two of them. It complements the curves of your perfect, mutated body.

I want you to see me in the light of which I see you. Hear me out, for once using my words instead of actions. So I can smile.

No, I may not be as intelligent as you might like, but the size of my heart makes up for that. Maybe you can beat me in anything physical, but I can cleanse you with an emotion unlike any you’ve ever experienced.

This is not an act of desperation. This is intimacy in its primitive state.

We can steal the Planet Express ship for a night. I won’t tell the professor. We’ll cruise across Mars, maybe even swing by Persei 8 for some space cream cones. I’ll play a song I wrote for you on an instrument from my era. It’s called a guitar and its sound is created using vibrations. Sounds sexy, doesn’t it?

I would like to take you out to that fancy restaurant in Earth’s orbit. You know the one… Elzar’s. But I can’t afford it. So let me cook you something, instead. I’ll make something the ancient Italians called “Lasagna.” It tastes like heaven (no not the theme park, the religious one from ancient Christianity) and you don’t need to add water to it!

Please, girl, let me show you how to shine brighter than the sun in Solar System 42A in the mist of summer. Just look at me. I want to smile.

Sometimes I can feel your pulse when you pass out on the couch with me watching COPS: Illegal Aliens. It becomes a melody I can’t stop humming. Those dreams you have about holding hands with an unnamed, unfaced man; it’s me. I’m holding your hand after you fall asleep in my lap. I can see the corners of your lips curving up every time.

I can read your mind, or so I’d like to believe. Don’t think I haven’t noticed the way you look at me. I see you blinking at me in the locker room, pretending to glance elsewhere when I catch you. It’s the reason why I try to stay in shape. It’s the reason why I take concern in my dental hygiene.

Listen to my words here, let’s give it a shot. What have you got to lose?

And if you so choose to decline my very informally written proposal, can you promise to just look at me with that beautiful eye every now and then? It’s just enough for me to believe my existence here is significant. Everyone deserves to smile, at the very least.

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Currently listening to: Gorillaz
Song: Stylo (ft. Mos Def and Bobby Womack)
Album: Plastic Beach

April 27, 2010

The Broad Set READING May 1st (promo post)

Shoes made out of wood are probably hard to walk in.

In any case, The Broad Set Writing Collective is going to read at their store!

Event Details:

Wooden Shoe Books
704 South Street
Philadelphia, PA 19147

May 1, 2010 from 7pm - 10pm.

Featured writers include: Eric Nelson, author of The Silk City Series, and DJ Berndt, editor of Pangur Ban Party.

Broad Set readers include (but are not limited to): Pete Richter, Sam Cicero, Andrew Kaspereen, Paul Mullin, Robin Barletta, Kiley Rummler, Glen Binger, and more!

Other things:
- A new issue of The Broad Set Quarterly [formerly Avalanche Tinder]
- the world famous grab bag!
- free magazines (prior and current issues!)
- Andrew Kaspereen will, again, be signing body parts
- Join the Facebook open event page
- then become a fan on Facebook
- PW events page!!!
- drinks afterwords at whatever bar is close!

DON'T FORGET ABOUT THE CONTEST GOING ON IN SUPPORT OF THIS READING!

Spread the word! Free high fives!

April 26, 2010

Leave No Trace

Camping last weekend at High Point, NJ.

It was fun even though it rained. Although the neighboring campsites left more trash floating around than possible for me and my friends to clean up. It's kind of depressing to know that there are people like that out there... and they are allowed to reproduce.

In literary news: The Broad Set is finalizing the latest magazine due out this Saturday for the reading at Wooden Shoe. Here is the facebook event for more info. I'll make a promo post tomorrow.

We also have an interview with the snazzy, spear-fishing xTx coming. Get pumped.

That is all for now. HIGH FIVE AWESOME!

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Currently listening to: 3oh!3
Song: House Party
Album: Streets of Gold

April 14, 2010

Get Ready. Get Set. Go.

Oh, hello. Didn't see you come in.

There is a new 50 to 1 lurking - 'Change the World' - check it out and then SUBMIT.

and

I also have a fresh piece up at New Wave Vomit called 'Death Makes Me Puke.' Can you hear me now?

Ana C. runs New Wave Vomit. It is a new venue. I suggest submitting something. A very fun little zine. Yay good job awesome high five!

The Broad Set has a Facebook page. Become a fan!

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Currently listening to: Spose
Song: Fuck It
Album: Preposterously Dank

April 11, 2010

For the Moment: Happy

Acceptances into:

Rejection Digest - 'Spreading Cancer'

and

Amphibi.us - 'Riding My Bike Home From Work'

Thank you Crispin and Shannon. You made my weekend worthwhile! More news to come, once I have some time to sit down and sort through the mush pile. Maybe even a new 50 to 1!

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Currently listening to: Against Me!
Song: You Look Like I Need A Drink
Album: As The Eternal Cowboy

April 7, 2010

Burning Through Your Eyes

This is what I did today:


Rode my bike from the beach to Allaire State Park and back (15 +/- miles).

This is what my best friend did today:

Snowboarded in Nevada at Lake Tahoe.


The rock and hard place: I don't want to grow up, but to be able to afford a trip such as going out to Lake Tahoe, I have to.

That makes me a sad panda. Damn you, Mark!

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Currently listening to: New Found Glory
Song: All Downhill From Here
Album: Catalyst

April 2, 2010

Delicious Treats

Savor the Flavor

is the new issue of 50 to 1! Check out the flash fiction awesomeness and then submit your own! We're calling for submissions.

Currently, it is too nice outside for me to create a dedicated blog post. I'm going to the beach. Sorry! [join me?]

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Currently listening to: John Mayer
Song: Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
Album: Continuum